How We Sell: Men vs Women

Enjoy this clip on the selling styles of men vs women from my recent live event.

Lucky Bee Video Transcript – How We Sell: Men vs Women

Selling Styles: How Men Sell

Ok, so this is how men sell, I’ve got a thing, you’re going to give me money for a thing, just pretend you’re giving me money. Oh, you’re actually giving me money, I’ll give it back! Here’s the thing, thanks! Go away happy right?

That’s how men sell. Thank you! I will take it if you want. For a calculator, go for it!

Thank you Troy that was it, that’s all you needed to do. Thank you!

Give him a hand.

I know that was really simplistic but that is how I noticed that men sell. But, they are just like I’ve got this thing, that person wants to buy the thing, do you want to buy the thing? Yes, I want to buy the thing, here’s the money for the thing, thank you! Go away!

That’s how it works right?

Selling Styles: How Women Sell

I don’t know if my thing is good enough, I’m not sure it’s the right thing, I think I need to do some work on the color to get the exact right color for it.

I think I need to go away work really hard, lose 10 kilograms then, I’ll sell the thing.

Then I’ll be okay selling the thing

I don’t know if I feel okay making money for something that is so fun to make. That’s kind of like greedy, maybe I should give it away for free. To people who really, really need it. Because that’s fair, right?

And then, you find an audience for it and you’re like, do you want to buy my thing? You don’t have to, it’s not very good. Hang on, maybe I should give you a discount because you’re so nice. Maybe I’ll give you this thing and hang on, what else can I give you?

I’m really conflicted about selling this thing. I feel really bad, I feel really bad that she’s going to spend money on this thing, she’s going to hate it. She’s going to ask for a refund.

I’m going to feel terrible about it. Maybe I shouldn’t bother.

Wait, no, I really do want to sell this thing, because I know where it’s going to get me. Ooohh… Alright, I’m going to sell it! Hang on I need to psyche myself up for it. Mercury has retrograded – I can’t stop now, can’t sell the thing!

Not this month, but I pulled an abundance card and I know exactly when I should sell the thing. Yeah, alright, okay, hang on, I’m just going to go talk to my mastermind buddy just for a second.

Wow! That felt really good.

Oops – I manifested a parking ticket for the exact cost of my thing.

That’s how women sell sometimes.

Put up your hand if you have done any of these things that I have mentioned. It’s okay, take a deep breath. Put your hand on your heart, “It’s my time I’m ready for the next step.”

It’s okay to sell your stuff and it’s okay to have conflicting emotions around it because honestly, everything that I just described is something that happened to me, not at the start of my business, in the last 12 months, easily!

And, when I first booked this event, I did the exact same thing, like when I first started talking to Sandra about doing this event, back in October, was it?

Alright, oh my God! If I go to the gym, every single day, how many weeks have we got? Maybe if I lose kilogram a week, yeah, I can be really skinny by the time that event comes around.

Who has thought that, honestly? 

You think, I can’t do those photos, I can’t do the website until I’ve lost weight.

I was honestly thinking, they’re not going to like me how I am. I really did think that, I was like, okay, I’ve got this many weeks and I thought, maybe I should get a personal trainer then I’ll be really skinny for them.

Thank you! Because I am enough, right? And, you are enough.

There’s been so many learnings from this event alone, I’ll put some together but one of the other things was I was starting to go really crazy over producing it especially for tomorrow because it’s going to be a much smaller group tomorrow. Who’s coming tomorrow, by the way? Cool! Lovely!

So I think it’s about 40 of us which should be really lovely but don’t worry, you’re not missing out on everything because I will just tell them, you’re enough! That’s all! That’s all I’m going to tell them. So, it’s okay.

But I was like, oh! I should get one of those cash machines you know that you stand in and you grab the money? I was like, I should totally do that and oh my God! Everyone should get nail polish. (Sorry, you’re not going to get that).

Do you know why I was doing it though? Because I was thinking, I was not enough. I was like, it’s not enough for them to just come and see me – that’s not enough.

I need some “razzle dazzle” to fool them into thinking that it’s worthwhile.

How many times have you done that?

Just put up your hand. Today? You did it today! Exactly, right? Exactly!

We’ve all done it, I can’t believe that I’m still doing it. Because I teach it and I tell people all the time, don’t undercharge and over deliver. You can totally over deliver as an experience but you don’t have to razzle dazzle and throw all those things in so people will like you, that’s what it comes down to.

It’s like I want you to like me so here’s the fucking nail polish! Please like me! So, sorry, you’re not getting that nail polish.

And then I was like, we were looking at table decorations and I was like, we’re going to make origami butterflies out of money because I wanted you to like me. Oh, I know! Sad!

But, I share that because I know that’s what happens right? That’s what happens when you put together your programs and your courses and if you’re a life coach, I bet your first life coaching session did not go for 60 minutes, I bet it went to 2 ½ hours. And I bet you’re just because, but you are enough!

You are enough and you have to understand your value and that does come overtime and you start to realize that the results that you get from people, the value that you give to people, that is enough!

And it’s all so worth charging for.


So, that’s how men sell and that’s how women sell, so funny! So just remember that next time you start to get freaked out.


Denise Duffield-Thomas | Lucky Bitch




P.S Can I ask you a favour?

Please share this video. Blog about it, share on Facebook, discuss it with your mastermind group, spark a lesson with your community. The lessons are so important for women to get.

I’m thrilled that the Facebook version has been shared so many times – more than 30,000 times. Thank you!

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  5. […] How We Sell: Men vs. Women – This is actually the transcript from a live event Denise did, but what she says is super powerful. There really is a big difference in how men and women sell and it all has to do with our thoughts. Really! I’m watching it again today because it resonates with my own thought process of selling products and services on my blog. (And the YouTube channel I need to start, but keep talking myself out of…) […]

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