Roundtable Discussion: Does the UK Have Money Blocks?
Hey gorgeous,
Does the UK have blocks and money mindset issues? There's no doubt that the country, the city, the town you live in, impacts and influences your money mindset.
I invited some members of my Money Bootcamp program, from the UK, to join me for a very juicy and real roundtable conversation, about how living in or growing up in the UK has impacted their money mindset.
Meet some of our Money Bootcamp members from the UK:
Jessie Shedden lives in South Wales, and she helps women extract the most potent stories from their life story, and create really compelling content.
“I joined Bootcamp in April, 2020.”
Dana Whiteland is based in Sheffield and her business is called Surprise & Delight.
“It does exactly that for your customers. Think onboarding gifts, or sending out marketing materials. I provide the surprise and delight people. I joined Bootcamp at the end of 2016.
Tanja Hassel is based in London and she’s a drawing coach.
“I'm originally from Germany, but I've been in London for 18 years. I'm an artist and a drawing coach. I paint and I do commissions and I help people who've always wanted to draw. I help people demystify the drawing world and discover how fun it is to draw. I joined Bootcamp in January, 2018.
Léa Cléret is based in Ross-on-Wye and is chief executive for a leadership development company.
“I'm French, working in England, and my partner is from South Africa. I joined Money Bootcamp in November 2020.”
Jo Howarth lives just outside Liverpool and she is an advanced hypnotherapist and mindfulness practitioner.
“I run a company called The Happiness Club, and I teach people how to look after their mental health and emotional wellbeing. I joined Money Bootcamp in January 2018.”
The UK’s Money Values and How to Break Through the Money Blocks
Democracy, rule of law, respect and tolerance, and individual liberty are the values of the UK.
Politeness is an unspoken British virtue. The stiff upper lip. The soldier on mentality. Keep calm and carry on. No matter what the weather, we're going to continue. Where in your business do you have the keep calm and carry on mentality? It could be that you don’t allow yourself to hire help, you don't take time off, you work through stress, or it could be that you just get on with it and not make a fuss.
There’s another British value of being restrained, of restraint. Where does that come up in your business?
Another value is tradition. Britain is one of the most traditional cultures in history. Where is that coming up in your business? Do you feel like making more money is against the natural order of things or against tradition in your family? Or are you allowed to be wealthy with your accent, or with your background?
Apologetic, is something that comes up for British people. Where does that show up in your business? Where do you apologize? Where do you feel like you have to hide? Following rules, queuing, for example. Taking your turn. Where are you waiting for your turn and not pushing yourself forward?
How Do the UK’s Money Values Affect Your Business and Success?
Jo Howarth: “The politeness one feels massive. I swear like a trooper but I only ever used to do it in private, and I wouldn't ever have put it in my business. That was kind of like I wasn't being completely myself. Because you said about restraint, I was holding myself back from speaking on social media, for instance, in the way that I would speak normally with my friends and family. So that's actually something that I've only really overcome in the last year or so. And I swear like a trooper on social media now.
The soldier on thing for me, is absolutely part of my upbringing, just shut up and get on with it. That's how I was brought up. Don't whinge, don't complain, just get the fuck on with it. That's a barrier for me with my clients, they don't believe that they're worthy of the kind of help that I offer, because they should just be able to cope with whatever life throws at them.
In terms of restraint, there’s something around selling too much. Hanging back from posting too often on social media. I post at least once a day on my social media with a sales message, and almost every time I do it, there’s a voice in my head, “All she does is sell.”
It’s not polite to talk about money. That's one of the things I love most about the Facebook group - it's the only space where I feel comfortable talking about my financial wins. I wouldn't dream of posting that on my own personal social media, how much money I've made this month.”
Léa Cléret: “In the UK, the class system means there’s still a sense of know your place. I came to the UK after a decade in North America. I started working in this company, and I wanted to change the name of our business development managers to customer success leaders. My colleague just burst out laughing, ‘That is preposterous and it's so American.’
You can't put yourself first and the benefit can never be for you. One thing that struck me when I came to the UK, is the amount of charities that exist here. People will set up charities or if you’re selling something, a percentage has to go to charity.
The company that I run used to be a foundation and it transitioned into a commercial organization. The mindset switch that had to happen was tough for a lot of people. Even though we do the same job, we deliver the same service, the fact that we’re no longer a not-for-profit organisation, is something that was really difficult for my staff.
The UK has an issue with money; just talking about it is a real problem.”
Tanja Hassel: “I am very polite. I love it. However, listening to Jo and Léa talk I realise there’s a lot there. Being self-employed brings up a lot. I have this sense of keep your head down, you're German. Someone's going to attack you for the past. If you get too well known, they're not going to like you because you're not English. You shouldn't really be there, even after all this time. I can have my little tiny group somewhere, but I can't be super successful.
I was one of the first who took life drawing online, during the pandemic. And then all these other people started groups, and they went much bigger. I felt like, ‘but I was here first, you should be queuing!’
From the moment I founded my drawing group, it was the same as everyone else's. The same model, same price structure, etc. I launched at the end of March 2020, and up until this summer, I ran six classes a week, every single week. And it was getting way too much and it wasn't sustainable and it wasn't working, but it was what everyone else was doing. And then I changed everything around to fit me. And I was pretty excited about it for about a month or two. And then all the fears came up of, you're different, you should have just kept going, you're not providing enough value if at the same time it suits you. If I'm not available 24/7 to my clients, then they shouldn't be paying me a monthly fee, because what about all that downtime? I’m working on shifting that.”
Dana Whiteland: “I used to live in London when I first graduated. I was contracting, earning decent money. Once I got married and we decided to have kids, I really wanted to be a stay-at-home mum. I always felt the need to apologize for being a stay-at-home mom. I did that for a few years. We moved back up north because of house prices and put the kids in a private school, which brings up guilt for me. You feel like you have to whisper it to people and you can't really tell them
I started my own business but it really wasn't my passion, so it really never took off. I'm always playing small. I've stopped posting on social media because I thought nobody wants to hear boring and stale. There's a massive social divide in the UK. Especially up north, I'm not in the lower income bracket. I don't want to ruffle people's feathers.
This comes up for me around pricing. I feel I need to give the price for what people can afford, rather naturally what it costs. The truth is, if people can't afford it, they're not my ideal client, and I need to go and find the bigger fish. I've been pricing small.”
Jessie Shedden: “The social class system is not spoken about but is so instrumental in business. My fiance's always lived on a poverty line and I’m upper class. We live in an industrial town, and when we moved I was like, ‘How on earth am I going to become who I want to become in this place?’ I carried a lot of shame about it. One of the Money Bootcampers who lives 40 minutes from me, in a Welsh mining town has done really well. She's into her millions now. There was a sense of if she can, I can. I don't even sell to people locally, I'm selling to people all over the world.
Asking for help has never come easily. There's that kind of die with your boots on attitude, particularly around here. That's what generations of miners did. They got maimed and they went back to work with one less limb.
In the valleys in Wales, you live in that valley and you die in that valley and you don't move outside of it. For me, it's always been a conscious decision to work with coaches and mentors that aren't in the UK. Because I'm like, I need something that gives me the freedom and the creativity that I don't get here, because everything has to be so structured.”
What Has Been Your Biggest Takeaway from Money Bootcamp?
Dana Whiteland: “I always feel that I need to ask for permission. That holds me back from owning my prices. The Facebook group is amazing for this, when I read other people's posts and think, so I've just gotta get out of my own way. I've tried to play small and I need to break free from that. That's how Money Bootcamp helps. Because you can see yourself peeling away these layers and evolving.”
Léa Cléret: “One of the biggest is fear of visibility, and I think it's definitely linked to a gender issue. I've always worked in very male dominated environments, and I'm a woman and a bit of an intellectual. I'm the opposite of what you would normally expect from a leadership development consultant. Bootcamp has helped me grow this new relationship. I'm completely rethinking the business, how we're going to position ourselves in the market. In the UK, there's still very strong gender issues. In North America it's so far ahead when it comes to the gender issues, gender pay gap, gender promotion.”
Jessie Shedden: “What the community has given me, is knowing that I can have authentic wealth, that has been really freeing. There's always more money. I'm seeing the proof that if I do go into some debt, more money just comes in.”
Jo Howarth: “There's so many things, but my biggest one is around not deserving, not being good enough. The biggest thing that Bootcamp has given me is the ability to peel back. At every level of business, of income, it resurfaces and I go back to Bootcamp and work through the BS excuses and the negative consequences and peel more of that back. The Facebook group is so inspiring.”
Tanja Hassel: “When I started Bootcamp I had a really powerful memory. As a child, I was told to save for something. When I finally saved up for it, I went to the shop and it was gone. And I remember thinking, If I wasn't poor, I could have bought it and now it's gone. I went home distraught - I was crying and my mom had bought it, because she was so impressed with how I'd been saving and how good I had been.
I learned that if I'm good enough or if people feel sorry for me enough, then I’ll get what I want. When I shifted the business and I turned it into a membership program, I realized that I do the same thing to my members, which is hugely disruptive to the business. That's the biggest theme I'm working on, taking back my financial power, so that I can give my clients back their autonomy. And we can have this business relationship rather than, please prove that you care about me by giving me money.
For a long time I followed all the free stuff and read the books. But actually joining Bootcamp made me look at things a lot closer. What I love about Bootcamp is the people. Without Bootcamp, I don't think I would be so aware.”
It’s Normal to Have Money Blocks and I Can Help You
There will be money mindset issues that come from your particular family, your profession, etc. This is what we do in Money Bootcamp. If you’re curious about how it works for you, the next step is to come and join us in Money Bootcamp, and work on your money mindset issues as well. We all have them. I have them, you have them, and you will continue having them no matter how much money you make. You can't go and clean up your money stuff before the cleaner comes. It's not how it works. The best time is now to deal with your money mindset issues.
Here’s an invitation. Come and be one of our next UK success stories. I would love to help you. Just go to denisedt.com/bootcamp. You can find out all about our course. You can read even more success stories and you can just come and join us straight away.
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